But then I woke up.
Oh yeah, I have no aunt Agnis Von Loot and that trusted law firm was just a bunch of skull emojis. What an banal dream that was. The kind you forget as soon as you get out of bed, which I did. Until the following night when I found myself in an endless, featureless expanse.
Dread—would be the word to describe it. If the feeling of dread was a place. The sky was a blood red haze in which colossal somethings hunted just beyond eyesight. The ground was made of shattered glass. Movements as slight as breathing caused a grinding glassy crunch that rang clear in the awful silence. Alerting ones presence to the untold numbers of unseen things.
For a time I stood paralyzed; already dead in this total vacuum of hope.
Then I saw it: the faintest shape on the horizon. There was something solid in all this nothing. I ran like I was about to die. Behind me I could sense everything malicious converge in pursuit. The shape became a rectangle, a bus, and old one from 50s that hadn’t moved in so long it had nearly become a geologic affectation, and on it a door. Escape. I pelted my full force against the weathered frame. It held fast. I wrenched desperately at the locked knob as despair breathed on down my neck. The key! Fumbling with adrenaline I grasped the small key from my left pocket where I had haphazardly placed it in last nights dream, jammed it in the lock and burst inside.
A small desk filled the majority of the improbably cramped space. The walls and ceiling were packed with random oddities so completely there was no telling the rooms true size. A taxidermied skunk on the desk spoke up.
“By entering this room you have agreed to take over operations of Von Loots Nightsurvival General LLC. Consider this your orientation, listen carefully.
This is highway X of the Prison island colony of Australia. A remote region of the collective unconscious where dreamers are sentenced to be punished for their dream-felonies. I, your dream-aunt prof. Agnis have dedicated my life to understanding the dream world. And I have found…that it makes no sense. But I have also discovered an incredible business venture! It’s simple: people in the midst of a nightmare are desperate, they’ll buy anything! So you’ll drive this bus around and sell them the supplies they need for a small fee of sanity; that’s the currency down here.
And you’ve got it all: Parachutes for falling dreams, snorkelers for drowning dreams, you name it! All you need to remember is this strictly is a low key operation. Nightmares gotta make a living too, and if they consider you a threat to their business… well you better have some estranged relatives to hand the business off to! Haha!”
The skunk sizzled with tv static and was gone.