Heeeey I see my gurl, Spider8reath.
I have been seeing a lot of discussion of cringe culture whenever I hang out in fandom spaces online. It's always curious to me because I think my perspective on these matters is like an outsider looking in. And to explain my perspective, it's like... well, I'm 28 years old. I'm not really a new adult anymore, although I still feel pretty young. And part of that experience of adulthood was a kind of clarity in understanding what people are looking for in other people. To really see what's going on socially when it comes to the ways people are judging each other. A lot of my interests are cringey, empirically speaking. Anime and manga interest as an adult is always something that stands apart from normality, no matter where you are in the world, from what I can tell. And the realization I had was that I could like what I liked and meet people's expectations at the same time. A lot of the judgements, I think, is wondering whether the other person can be reliable and serious about things beyond their hobbies. There's also a lot of baseless judgement for having weird interests as well, but the judgements the other person usually think are legitimate, like feeling like one can pull ones own weight or is competent at the jobs they take on, or can be relied upon to add things of value (earn money, be a good listener, be a good organizer, can take care of children, really anything people rely on others for) are the big ones. These are the judgements that always attend adult life, I believe.
And it's perfectly possible to prove to others that you do things of value while also sincerely enjoying what matters to you. I think when you are comfortable in normal society you can most shamelessly acknowledge what you care about, because you're not desperate for approval. If you've already proven yourself, then you're free from the fear of others' judgements. Most importantly, you've got to believe that you've got nothing left to prove, and to really believe it, not force yourself to believe it when secretly you still agree with other people's judgements.
At this point, you'll remember why it is you like something. You'll remember there's a reason you love this thing, and remember that love and think about that love instead of your insecurities. Because insecurities can be dealt with through the reassurance of people who know you, from seeing the reality of having earned respect.
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