What are some phrases that piss you off?

[lakes]

I dislike when people say "In a perfect world" and then explain a solution to a problem as if that problem would still be there, when they mean a better world. In a perfect world, that solution won't even be necessary and I think it shows how limited people's imaginations are, that even when we think of an impossible perfect world, we're still assuming certain problems would exist.

[petrichoran]

"if you can't do it right, don't do it at all" or some variation of that

like, in most situations, no?? obviously there are some exceptions, but isn't it better to get bad sleep than no sleep at all? do one of your two loads of laundry? show up late to something important rather than completely skip it?

if you can't do something with enough effort to be worth it, then don't. i think that's a better saying, but it doesn't have a good ring to it. the original always made me feel like i had to be absolutely perfect as a kid, which did a lot more harm than good.

[Noah_S]

"Normal"

I'm actively exiling that word from my vocabulary except for when talking about pokemon types or why I don't like the word.

Some people use it to mean "common" and some use it to mean "acceptable". And when neither side considers that, the communication is just doomed to fail until someone thinks of it or they have it pointed out by a third party. I'm someone who used to think that people meant acceptable when it's much more likely that they meant common.

Okay so one saying that I USED to hate is "Can't have your cake and eat it too."

I would get furious about how little sense it makes - why would you want a cake if you can't eat it? What else is the purpose of a cake? But one day it 'clicked' for me and now it's one of my favourite phrases, I love to apply it liberally and often, and therefore have discovered that many people I know are also confused and angered by it. But it's too late for me, it's part of my language now. Is this a blessing or a curse?

In other languages that one is said more like "eat the cake and still have it". At first I couldn't understand why so many native English speakers don't like the phrase, before it clicked for me that my brain had been autocorrecting when translating.

using medical or exclusive terms for everyday things. "trigger" and "triggered" have been misused for years, and i'm still upset about it. (C)PTSD trigger is not the same as being annoyed, or scared, or upset.
also, people without ADHD saying "my new hyperfixation" instead of "strong interest" or "passion." hyperfixation is not just a cool word. 9_9

Big agreement from me about the medical terms. That removes the language from people who it does apply to because people don't take it seriously anymore. I do have something to add specifically about "trigger". Part of the backlash had some people arguing that some things can't be a trigger. I'm sure some of them were ignorant and some were taking advantage of the situation to push whatever their brand of bigotry was while hiding that that's what they were doing. But I encountered multiple people who argued for example that if a song was playing on loop during the event that gave someone (C)PTSD, the song still can't be called triggering for them because the song wasn't the problem, the event would've been just as traumatic without it. Which... yes, it would've but that's not how the pattern recognition that results in triggers work. Hunter gatherer brain doesn't care that there's not always a tiger behind that tree, it cares that there can be a tiger behind that tree.


On a similar note to the above, people hijacking therapy speech. Like using "boundary" in an attempt to control others. An appropriate boundary is "when I'm at work my private phone is on do not disturb". It's not "no one is allowed to send me a text message when I'm at work". I've had people misuse that word way worse in my past before it became a popular word.

[riku]

"i wish i had a life like yours" - this just assumes that the person's life is all perfect with no flaws  someone said to me once, i didnt even know what to say after that.

"no offense" - everytime someone says this, i automatically assume they're about to say something offensive because the amount of people misusing the phrase to say offensive stuff is crazy 

"you people cant do anything" or a variation of that - people often say this to disabled people, its just ablelist

"its just a joke" / "calm down its a joke" / "you cant take a joke" - when people joke about sensitive topics like 9/11 or bigotry. i am tired of people using this as an excuse to be hateful or cover it up as "dark humour" 

[Metropolis]

"no offense" - everytime someone says this, i automatically assume they're about to say something offensive because the amount of people misusing the phrase to say offensive stuff is crazy 

REAL! they are trying to be offensive, if u have to say no offensive in front of ur actual statement, u lowkenuinly are probably being offensive.

[Dynaknights]

I can't stand it when people misuse terms. Like, misused neurodivergent/mental health terms ("going nonverbal" or "hyperfixation" are some popular ones) or AAVE (every time a corporation uses AAVE at all I want to strangle myself to death). There's also when people censor themselves, like with "goofy ahh," "unalived," "grape," or "PDF File." It's so goddamn annoying to me. </3

[Vidknight]

When it comes to phrases that piss me off there is very little that does. There are some that slightly irk me, but nothing that boil my piss. At least what I thought until I came across 2 phrases that I hate soooo much.

1. "Look it up sweetie" "Read a book" "google is free" or something along those lines where you ask somebody a question and instead of answering said question they respond in the most snarky way possible. Why do people do this?  Just answer the question!

Yes even if the question is somebody incredibly easy like "how do I copy and paste?" it doesn't hurt to just answer the question everybody is on different level and by being snarky people is way less likely to ask you anything and as such that amount of people who knows that thing is lower than it will be by just answering the question!

2. "I'm X years old my life is so over!" Now this one I get that this is mostly a joke, but it's one of those jokes that I find played out and also dangerous as people start to unironically believe it. Yea you're like 27 years old and still don't have it figured out...

So what? Everybody progress at different speed some people just have it figured out and understand from the age of 15 others don't have anything figured out until 60 years old.

I feel that I can go into a lot more detail about why I absolutely hate this phrase on a blog one day, but long story short it just reeks of defeatism and just a general idea that life is like a stair case that everybody progress at the same speed and just a giant confusing road where some people have a map that is complete while others has just a piece of paper with "Good luck lmao" written on it.

You're never too old as long as you try and put some effort in you're doing alright!

[lakes]

There's also when people censor themselves, like with "goofy ahh," "unalived," "grape," or "PDF File." It's so goddamn annoying to me. </3

I also hate this. It's worse when it's literally about a serious topic. Like thanks for letting me know that you care more about views and the algorithm than showing respect to any victims.

[Noah_S]

I also hate this. It's worse when it's literally about a serious topic. Like thanks for letting me know that you care more about views and the algorithm than showing respect to any victims.

Yes. And people do it even in places where the algorithm won't censor them. And act as if that's showing respect because "those words are hard". Yes, that's the point! They carry weight and swapping them for some "cute" term only dismisses what they are.

"you people cant do anything" or a variation of that - people often say this to disabled people, its just ablelist

Or the opposite. "Yes you can do it", "don't let your disability control your life" and so on when it's in response to you saying that you can't do something.

[sloth_army1]

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"its just a joke" / "calm down its a joke" / "you cant take a joke" - when people joke about sensitive topics

As someone who has in the past argued that a joke can be made of any topic regardless of how volatile the subject matter if done right, I strongly agree. I hate the idea that something being a joke somehow makes it "not count" as far as it's effects go, when it really is the opposite. Jokes are one of the most effective tools for normalizing and reinforcing harmful ideas, and I think you need to be more carefully about what message you're conveying when you make one, not less.

This one is smaller, but I've been trying to cut any version of calling someone "stupid" out of my vocabulary. Intelligence is a very subjective idea which cannot be reliably measured in any meaningful capacity, and if someone's mistake is based entirely around misunderstanding something or a failure of logic, that is something completely understandable that they do no deserve to be insulted for. It doesn't help that so many words (at least in english) that mean unintelligent have abilist origins.

[Nathan]

“We're broke, but hang in there.”
“The Owl House is bad because it's full of autists, gays, and morons. Anyway, Trump won, so suck my dick.”
And the most infuriating part: “We stand for traditional values”
But they block everything, even censoring comics and books so the kids don't see them.

Basically, these are phrases and things I hear/see all the time in my country. And it makes me mad that people just follow along like sheep and thinks it’s all right. 

[Iceglobe_System]

"To have the balls" as in, to be brave, and "pussy" as in someone that's cowardly. It's really misogynistic in nature, but nobody really talks about it? - Maxine

[windit]

Or the opposite. "Yes you can do it", "don't let your disability control your life" and so on when it's in response to you saying that you can't do something.

I had a hilarious sub-type of this the other day. I was trying to use a power tool for the first time in my life, and couldn't figure out how to make it release the drill bit so that I could swap it out. I was on a farm, and a guy was walking past, so I asked him, 'hey, do you know how to use a drill?' and he came over and said,  'Kind of, but also, YOU know how to use a drill'. He was saying it like he was trying to build up my confidence because I'm a woman, but like, I literally don't have the information that I require in order to use this drill! It's not about my lack of self belief, I just need to be shown that you rotate it counter-clockwise to release the bit, and once I know that, I'm good to go.   

Anyway a curve ball but I thought I would throw in a word that I really enjoyed the other day, which is 'bother'. My sister described someone as really 'bothering' them and it's such a quaint but effective word.

[mortaki]

"To have the balls" as in, to be brave, and "pussy" as in someone that's cowardly. It's really misogynistic in nature, but nobody really talks about it? - Maxine

Yeah! This! The argument people always have when I bring up the use of "pussy" as a synonym of coward is that it's a shortening of the word "pusillanimous" which does actually mean coward or weak-willed, but my question is then: why did we start using a word for coward to describe women's anatomy? There was no reason that I can find for us to start doing that?

It drive me insane sometimes how people often stop at one degree of explanation without looking deeper or drawing the next obvious connection.

[Iceglobe_System]

You're so right!

It's like they're just looking for excuses instead of going to the logical conclusion.
(Which is that the term is misogynistic, and should not exist.)

But even if it was just a shortening of "pusillanimous", (and if people were SO desperate to call them similar things) , couldn't we have just made them separate words??

Like, have pusi for coward (pronounced differently too because of the single s + i instead of a double s + y.) And pussy for the part?

Also, wait, that + "pussy" usually being a slang-y / unprofessional term?


 Who made this word and how can I get revenge. >:[ / half joking but also half serious.  - Maxine