What is housing like for forum members?

[nemmoue]

I am feeling really down about my search for housing tonight, and wondering what other forum members' housing situations are like.  Do you live alone?  With a roommate, family, friends, partners?  How long have you lived in your current place?  Do you want to stay there?  Do you want to leave?  All things housing!  I guess I'm hoping it will make me feel better to realize I am not the only one stuck in transience/ perpetually almost homeless/ always struggling to find a place with reasonable accomodations..  

I for one really want to move!  I moved between U.S. states twice this year already.  It was cheaper where I was before, but I was far away from my family.  Now I'm living with my family again, but it's so cramped!  And no matter where I look for apartments, there is nothing but the most unreasonable prices.. my financial situation is better then it's ever been, but the housing market is just so dire.  And meanwhile there are people in a town nearby who are PROTESTING against NEW HOUSING BEING BUILT!  My state has one of the highest homelessness rates in the country, but people are really going to protest new housing being developed on old land or old buildings?!  It's like archival and historical significance outweighs human lives..  as people often believe many things to..

that's enough from me, I'll just complain forever otherwise.  tell me about your house!  i'm hungry for hope 
 

[mozelle]

I comepletely feel u    currently in part time care of cps :') with my brother always, though.  ime still too young 2 move away but the prices of living are scary as!! fuck !!! 

sometimes i'me with my biological family (I hAATE that refusal sint allowed  ) nd sometimes with carers or other family , . I feel ur struggle op. lotsa hugs from me . I hope youh find a place someday !!

  

[bugfeli]

right now i've living in some really bare-bones house that's been in my family for a long time. several people have lived in it before me and my dad and it's about ruined from stupid stuff like nailing industrial sized nails into dry wall without checking for studs or lines. but its a slight upgrade from my living situation a few months back where i was staying on a friend's couch and practically living at my high school after hours. otherwise it's alright cos i still don't spend much time at home between classes and work.

also, really hope house searching starts looking brighter for you!! from the little i've done it seems like an absolute nightmare right now, being practically homeless is really dehumanizing and i wouldn't wish it on anyone. sending you tons of luck 

[Audball]

I currently am back with my folks for the foreseeable future. I had moved out with my at-the-time-long-term girlfriend and we moved from apartment to apartment. We broke up, I moved back in. Now because of many a thing going on in my life, I don't see myself moving out Any time soon (unless I get kicked out, but they've made it clear on many occasions they're not going to do that.)

Do I wanna get out of this house? Absolutely. Don't hate my parents or anything but goodness GRACIOUS do I miss having an entire living space to myself.

Getting any sort of housing out here can be very tricky. It's definitely not the worst place in the world to do so but it still falls into the trap of even the worst, most run down apartments go for $1000/mo. or more (which I know is NOTHING in some places, but factoring in cost of living in this area its horrid.)

[Eunice]

I'm lucky enough to live in my own house. Well, there is a mortgage, so I guess it belongs to them until it's paid! I live with my husband and sometimes our daughter, when she comes back here for a while.

I left home when I was 19 and couldn't wait to get away from the parents. I lived in student housing, a bedsitter, and a couple of flats when the chap and I started living together. We only went in for "proper" housing when our daughter was on the way.

[tarraxahum]

I live and have always lived with my parents, and have little hope of moving out until some sort of a grandparent inheritance hits me (which I'm not looking towards happening soon, for obvious reasons, may everyone stay alive and healthy). On one hand I'm very privileged to be able to do that without, like, scandals or trauma involved, on the other hand that does affect my self-esteem a bit. Also makes it very hard for my folks to stop treating me a bit like a child since I've never physically 'moved out' of that definition. It's kind of grating when you're almost 30 and paying for your share of the bill, but what can you do.

The housing sitch here is whack and me having a rather low-paying profession does not help in the slightest. But we stay silly 

[crow-queen]

I live with my bf, we have a mortgage on a semi-detached house from the 1920s, 2.5 bedrooms, 1 bathroom. We have been living here for 4 years now, we have a goal to move to somewhere a little bigger in a few years, since bf would like to do some small-scale farming & land management (rn he is doing garden farming), but it will most likely require us to move to a less populated area, away from family, which will be tough.
How we managed to get a mortgage so soon in life, my bf and I both left education at 18, went into tech jobs and began saving up for the deposit. Not doing higher education meant we don't have student loans to pay off, and going for a mortgage earlier in life meant we could take a longer term mortgage with lower minimum payments per month. Previously I was living with my parents, sibling, and my parents' pets in a 2 bedroom 1 bathroom home. It was really crowded and caused a lot of stress for me growing up (as well as having a negative effect on my hygiene), so I wanted to move into my own home ASAP & bf was supportive of this.

[BlazingCobaltX]

I've always been in the conflicting situation where I do not want to live in this country. Before COVID, all my future plans were focused on getting abroad at some point. Now, having worked here for a bit and checking prospects abroad, it is unfortunately better for me to remain here for a bit longer and gain a PhD. Up until last year, I never even considered renting a place here - I refused to submit to predatory housing prices. But I had one quarter-life crisis last year about missing out on life and another one this year, so the idea of moving out can no longer be ignored.

My friend suggested to me we find a place to rent together, and despite the potential risks to the friendship I had to agree with that plan, as there's just no other way for us to live in our desired city. I am now waiting for him to get his first paycheck to start looking for rentals properly. It will be the second time ever I will deal with the rental market, but the first time went so smoothly that I might as well be entirely inexperienced. Aside from a short period abroad, I have always lived with my parents in my childhood home. Nothing wrong with the home whatsoever, but I desperately crave anonymity that I don't have in this neighbourhood.

[Tommie ΘΔ]

I currently live with my family, being 17 and all. Honestly, I likely won't move out until I'm 19. And even then, it'll definitely be an apartment (which sounds great to me, tbh)

I live in an older house from the late 1800s, iirc, with a good bit of forest in the back!! Lived here since I was 8-9 I think, enough time to explore everything in the forests. We get a lot of animals back there too!! Deer, foxes, coyotes, all those critters 

As much as I miss the house I lived in when I was little, I really do like my current home. I hope you can find a place that will suit you just as well

[Melooon]

I am feeling really down about my search for housing tonight

Ooph; I was doing a disappointing late night house search last night too

I live in a really small city center house with 5 flatmates and none of us really get along The house is too small; the rents are too high, the area is not super safe. I pay about 500 euro a month rent for a 2x4 meter room (which I actually really like, its in the attic and is super cozy) ~ but its also too small so I often rent extra space in the city to work from (which I cant afford!); my flatmate on the other side of the wall often comes in at 2am drunk and screams and bangs things and that's not very pleasant.

There are things I like about being in a city; particularly this one, which has a big food culture; I love cooking so having a great market for ingredients is fantastic. However I'm also really starting to feel like I'm not a city kid anymore; its partly me, but Iv also watched this city decay since I was in school and most people I knew here are gone; I miss being in the countryside and having space and air and feeling safe.

Right now I'm basically stuck; if I move, at a minimum my rent will go up by about 200 euro; and If I ever hope to not be sharing, it'll go up by more like 700 euro. That's not realistically compatible with being an artist, so I'd really need to reassess my life to make that possible ~ maybe something will change or I'll get some funding to open up options, but right now not a lot's possible

The best advice I can give is to just stay calm, make the best of what you've got and keep looking; something always comes up if you keep an open mind, play a long game and stay focused.

On one hand I'm very privileged to be able to do that without, like, scandals or trauma involved, on the other hand that does affect my self-esteem a bit.

I spent two years staying with parents during the pandemic and I had exactly the same experience It was really nice to have people to watch movies with, and talk, and have BBQs, and in a lot of ways it was a super special time that I really miss now; but it was also really frustrating to be infantilized (parents cant help it ) and not having the feeling I was living my own life.

[xixxii]

i can't work and got no (bio)family to fall back on, so i've been living with a generous friend for... about four years now. right now we're in a house they own and it's just the two of us and our two cats (one mine, one theirs). the house is small and a little ugly but cute and i like our neighborhood+town a lot, but i wish it felt more "mine".
housing is super expensive and hard to find in my state (even worse if you have a pet), and subsidized housing has a waitlist that some people are on for years. (although sometimes it's only a few months; it's really unpredictable :/)
i've only ever lived in this one state, so it'd be nice to try living elsewhere someday! there's a lot of world out there i've never been to.
things are basically fine, although it's hard to not feel insecure and awkward when your housing is totally dependent on other people. 

hang in there, everybody!

there's a place for us - somewhere a place for us - peace and quiet and open air wait for us ! 

[soapfriendo]

i still live with my parents and don't really see myself moving out for the next few years, and because of personal stuff and that we live so far away from any good social environment, i have no irl friends, and it sucks considering the city i live near is known for having a lotta ppl i could click with. basically my short term goal in life if to move out of here and to be even a little less reliant on ppl i don't even like, and long term being to have irl friends i actually like and to be a pretty decent local artist, but as i stand now and for the next few years i'm nothing more than a secluded internet addict

[nemmoue]

How we managed to get a mortgage so soon in life, my bf and I both left education at 18, went into tech jobs and began saving up for the deposit. Not doing higher education meant we don't have student loans to pay off, and going for a mortgage earlier in life meant we could take a longer term mortgage with lower minimum payments per month.

I've wondered about this for me and my partner too, earlier this summer I was looking into the options of building a house (an old roommate said it'd be more cost efficient then trying to buy) and realized I'd be out like.. 40k just for a septic hookup alone!  (We live in a very rural area with no sewer system).  Seeing so many forum members with mortgages makes me wonder if we can get a mortgage or a grant too, so we could afford a downpayment..  

i can't work and got no (bio)family to fall back on, so i've been living with a generous friend for... about four years now. right now we're in a house they own and it's just the two of us and our two cats (one mine, one theirs). the house is small and a little ugly but cute and i like our neighborhood+town a lot, but i wish it felt more "mine".
housing is super expensive and hard to find in my state (even worse if you have a pet), and subsidized housing has a waitlist that some people are on for years. (although sometimes it's only a few months; it's really unpredictable :/)

oh god story of my life!!! I can't work either and my disability income isn't enough to afford an actual rental.  But none of the subsidized programs have any decent waittime-- it really is a years-in-the-making wait.  my therapist told me that I might have OK luck with section 8 if I claim I am homeless (which isn't far from the truth-- i'm grifting on my family's goodwill alone right now and i've been transient plenty of times before; sheltered but living in vans and campers and shit.)  i'm so glad you have a friend like that though xixxii.  even if it's tough to feel dependant i'm glad you are sheltered!! 

[caracalled]

I got lucky about three years ago and found this apartment which is 520 euro for a downtown one bedroom of 45 sq mt of my own, which is still really cheap for this area.
My partner moved in with me about three months ago, and the flat is just big enough for us together (but not for a cat sadly ). He moved here from the US so we're still figuring out a lot of stuff in terms of money, taxes and housing and ESPECIALLY dealing with the authorities for his visa.

How we managed to get a mortgage so soon in life, my bf and I both left education at 18, went into tech jobs and began saving up for the deposit. Not doing higher education meant we don't have student loans to pay off, and going for a mortgage earlier in life meant we could take a longer term mortgage with lower minimum payments per month.

This seems so smart! My partner and I have been considering getting married in the foreseeable future so saving up for a deposit seems like a good idea when I read your post! Housing is really scary and I'd like to have secure housing as quickly as I can in life...

[crow-queen]

This seems so smart! My partner and I have been considering getting married in the foreseeable future so saving up for a deposit seems like a good idea when I read your post! Housing is really scary and I'd like to have secure housing as quickly as I can in life...

Yeah, we aren't married but have been together for almost a decade, there were different legal agreements available for joint ownership since we're not married and therefore purchasing as 2 individuals, and we went with the one that seemed most fair at the time, we both pay the same amount towards the house and bills since we have split ownership, but since in my job I am paid more, I pay more towards the food. In my country there is not much benefit to getting married and it can be just as expensive as a housing deposit, so we decided to show our committment with joint home ownership instead. (we are perhaps not very romantic lol)

I've wondered about this for me and my partner too, earlier this summer I was looking into the options of building a house (an old roommate said it'd be more cost efficient then trying to buy) and realized I'd be out like.. 40k just for a septic hookup alone!  (We live in a very rural area with no sewer system).

 

Where I live it is really rare for someone to build a house rather than move into an existing house or a house built by a company, so this was never really a consideration for us. Even just finding appropriate land would be a challenge. Nowadays new houses are usually made by big companies which will buy up large sections of land and build many poor quality houses tightly packed in together for the most profit possible. My house was built in 1926 i think (the older documents were a little confusing to understand). We have considered having a house built in the future as we have plans to move somewhere a little more rural but ... I'd like the ghosts to come free with the house if possible lol

Seeing so many forum members with mortgages makes me wonder if we can get a mortgage or a grant too, so we could afford a downpayment..   

There are some programs in my country where you can get certain savings accounts to help you afford your deposit on your house (I think the new version it lets you take it out for other important life events too if you need to).
There are also schemes for some houses where the government owns part of your house and you pay towards them to purchase that part of the house ownership, this keeps the initial deposit low, but I feel somewhat distrustful of those schemes because the government likes to screw people in government housing over.
I'd definitely take a look around at what options there are, here some estate agents have mortgage advisors who will give free advice around if there are any schemes you can take advantage of