Hey y'all!
I am a painter currently dealing with the depiction of
a falling out of character, or
Ver-rückt-heit ![Eurgh! :tnt:](https://forum.melonland.net/Smileys/ALIEN/eurgh.gif)
and trying to do research on this topic through an open forum approach, as it also touches on mental wellbeing and other issues and can vary so much in experiences!
Thus, I would love to have an exchange with you here, in this somewhat familiar format!
So, I've been thinking on how to visualize this slippage which, being caught by a glance, may need to be recognized as such by others? Thinking along the concept of performativity, what is the difference between a bad actor and from someone who simply finds themselves in the wrong place at the wrong time as an Other?
Actually, what is a falling out of character? What memories do you have? What does it look and feel like?
What space can self-efficacy take in that stage-like flatness? Is it madness or testing the ropes of social relations? Does it require observational distance or does it touch on things a lot closer than one would like?
Luckily, I am able to conduct all this from the safety of a residency in Denmark and with the support of a Museum, which deals with this magical local artist: Ovartaci, whose life(/ves) and magical flammenmensker thinking is inspiring and who most importantly of all kind of managed to reconcile themselves with their psychosis through their artistic reliving of their "reincarnations"? (Ovartaci is fascinating I know it sounds wild, but they are a lot!) What do the relations between trauma and Verrücktheit (madness, in German it literally means displacement or shift as in shifting of chairs) look like?
But as a painter I always ask myself which images need to be unveiled and which ones are not quite right or important. So with increasing social and technological control where can a falling out of character occur? Maybe in avatars? Between the lines of Hypertext? In online role plays that play on a different life?
What do you think? What is the important image in all this? Where does subjectivity live?
I apologize for this still being a slightly confused introduction and very much am looking forward to be in conversation with the amazing community out here at Melonland!
As you can see I am very excited about all this so please feel free to ask any questions or go with any thread of thought that you have!
Thank you all and lots of love <3